"It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
This quote was in Timmy's grammar lesson one day, and I noticed it as I was checking his punctuation lesson.
This quote has always meant a lot to me, and it keeps meaning more and more.
Sometimes the only way to expel darkness is not to curse it, but to light a candle.
It's so tempting to curse the darkness--the darkness of injustice, unfairness, hypocrisy, and pain of whatever kind.
Maybe you are never tempted to curse darkness because you have never felt unbearable pain.
When Corrie ten Boom was talking with a man unable to rid himself of his burden of hatred and bitterness toward the people who had dropped a bomb on his home and destroyed his family, she did not just preach to him to forgive them as he told her in black despair that so many other people had preached at him and counseled him.
She could understand already that he could not forgive. She had been in those same shoes at one time--when a guard who had forced her to walk naked past other guards on her way to prison was in one of her services and came up to ask her to forgive him.
She could not. All the bitter humiliation of those moments and those memories haunted her, and she could not forgive.
It was too much.
But in her raw pain, she made a choice--with all her lack of forgiveness she chose to reach out to shake his hand,
and that was when the love of God flooded her heart and forgiveness was suddenly there.
For this man, the pain, still so raw, was the same bitter anguish that Corrie knew.
And she understood that preaching about forgiveness was not what this man needed.
There was too much pain and darkness.
So God gave her the wisdom to ask him, "How do we get rid of darkness from a room?"
Do we push it out with a broom? Do we flap a towel about and chase it out?
No, you just simply open the door and let the light in!
Corrie ten Boom told the man that if he could not forgive, he could choose to open his heart to God's love, just like he could open a door to bring light to a dark room, and God's love would simply chase the darkness and unforgiveness out!
That illustration helped the man understand, and while he could not forgive, he could at least open his heart to God's love.
And when He did, the love chased the hate out!
Yes, suddenly, he could finally forgive.
It was a sort of inverted order of what is usually preached. God's love first bringing healing to that deep, anguished, humiliating pain, and then the power to forgive came.
This story came back to me again in the last couple days as I was battling searing pain over things that had been unbearable for me,
things that had left me totally humiliated, confused, sleepless, bursting into tears over and over, and I couldn't get rid of the pain of it all--
until I remembered this story today. It had helped me overcome another similar situation.
I hope that if a reader is struggling with something you can't overcome, that you will understand that God is not going to pound you over the head with some kind of concept, however spiritual and even Biblical, that doesn't work for you in the middle of your pain.
So the Bible is used to wallop you over the head.
Sometimes the pain is so great you can't forgive, and you can't function no matter how much of a Christian you profess to be.
That is when you need a different word picture, a story, if you will, rather than an abstract concept, however spiritual, of forgiveness.
You need, like I did, a word picture of darkness and a candle or a window.
Maybe you can't "get" how to forgive these people or give to God the hurtful situation, but you can "get" how to open a window or a door in a dark room, and let the sunshine in.
You can "get" asking God for His love.
And the amazing thing is that when you simply open your heart to God's love, light comes pouring into your darkness, and that love replaces all the hatred and bitterness, all the pain and frustration.
Suddenly, there is a bubbling joy, like I experienced today. I didn't know that days from the searing pain, the hills would be singing and the trees would be clapping their hands as I read in Isaiah 55 today.
Corrie ten Boom understood, as they teach at Caring for the Heart Ministries, that sometimes a person has to find healing for at least part of the pain in their lives and heart before they are able to forgive.
Sometimes the pain is just too deep, or too recent, or too raw.
Sometimes you have to help the person take their pain to Christ for healing before they can forgive.
Let us not be unaware of this need.
It is an incredible way to help someone be able to forgive--first ask Jesus to fill their hearts with His healing love that drives out the darkness and bitterness and unabated pain.
I know it was this way for me--over and over.
That is what we take ourselves and others to Jesus for--for healing from the hurts that leave us crushed and broken, so that we can forgive and be healed ourselves even if the other person never understands or acknowledges where they were wrong or where they hurt you, however right they think they were.
"Jesus, I can't forgive, but I want to open my heart to Your love."
This prayer holds amazing, miracle-working power.
If we are in a dark situation, or a time of confusion, or a time of grief or loss,
It's so tempting to curse the darkness--the darkness of injustice, unfairness, hypocrisy, and pain of whatever kind.
Maybe you are never tempted to curse darkness because you have never felt unbearable pain.
When Corrie ten Boom was talking with a man unable to rid himself of his burden of hatred and bitterness toward the people who had dropped a bomb on his home and destroyed his family, she did not just preach to him to forgive them as he told her in black despair that so many other people had preached at him and counseled him.
She could understand already that he could not forgive. She had been in those same shoes at one time--when a guard who had forced her to walk naked past other guards on her way to prison was in one of her services and came up to ask her to forgive him.
She could not. All the bitter humiliation of those moments and those memories haunted her, and she could not forgive.
It was too much.
But in her raw pain, she made a choice--with all her lack of forgiveness she chose to reach out to shake his hand,
and that was when the love of God flooded her heart and forgiveness was suddenly there.
For this man, the pain, still so raw, was the same bitter anguish that Corrie knew.
And she understood that preaching about forgiveness was not what this man needed.
There was too much pain and darkness.
So God gave her the wisdom to ask him, "How do we get rid of darkness from a room?"
Do we push it out with a broom? Do we flap a towel about and chase it out?
No, you just simply open the door and let the light in!
Corrie ten Boom told the man that if he could not forgive, he could choose to open his heart to God's love, just like he could open a door to bring light to a dark room, and God's love would simply chase the darkness and unforgiveness out!
That illustration helped the man understand, and while he could not forgive, he could at least open his heart to God's love.
And when He did, the love chased the hate out!
Yes, suddenly, he could finally forgive.
It was a sort of inverted order of what is usually preached. God's love first bringing healing to that deep, anguished, humiliating pain, and then the power to forgive came.
This story came back to me again in the last couple days as I was battling searing pain over things that had been unbearable for me,
things that had left me totally humiliated, confused, sleepless, bursting into tears over and over, and I couldn't get rid of the pain of it all--
until I remembered this story today. It had helped me overcome another similar situation.
I hope that if a reader is struggling with something you can't overcome, that you will understand that God is not going to pound you over the head with some kind of concept, however spiritual and even Biblical, that doesn't work for you in the middle of your pain.
So the Bible is used to wallop you over the head.
Sometimes the pain is so great you can't forgive, and you can't function no matter how much of a Christian you profess to be.
That is when you need a different word picture, a story, if you will, rather than an abstract concept, however spiritual, of forgiveness.
You need, like I did, a word picture of darkness and a candle or a window.
Maybe you can't "get" how to forgive these people or give to God the hurtful situation, but you can "get" how to open a window or a door in a dark room, and let the sunshine in.
You can "get" asking God for His love.
And the amazing thing is that when you simply open your heart to God's love, light comes pouring into your darkness, and that love replaces all the hatred and bitterness, all the pain and frustration.
Suddenly, there is a bubbling joy, like I experienced today. I didn't know that days from the searing pain, the hills would be singing and the trees would be clapping their hands as I read in Isaiah 55 today.
Corrie ten Boom understood, as they teach at Caring for the Heart Ministries, that sometimes a person has to find healing for at least part of the pain in their lives and heart before they are able to forgive.
Sometimes the pain is just too deep, or too recent, or too raw.
Sometimes you have to help the person take their pain to Christ for healing before they can forgive.
Let us not be unaware of this need.
It is an incredible way to help someone be able to forgive--first ask Jesus to fill their hearts with His healing love that drives out the darkness and bitterness and unabated pain.
I know it was this way for me--over and over.
That is what we take ourselves and others to Jesus for--for healing from the hurts that leave us crushed and broken, so that we can forgive and be healed ourselves even if the other person never understands or acknowledges where they were wrong or where they hurt you, however right they think they were.
"Jesus, I can't forgive, but I want to open my heart to Your love."
This prayer holds amazing, miracle-working power.
If we are in a dark situation, or a time of confusion, or a time of grief or loss,
or we don't understand, or we don't know what to do--
rather than curse the darkness, let us light a candle.
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