Tonight was one of the most miserable nights I've spent after chemo. Nausea, acid reflux, headache, exhaustion, hot feet with neuropathy, messed up innards and other ailments. It's a relief that last week's chemo is supposed to be the last for now.
Tossing and turning in bed, I started thinking of an idea for a poem, knowing some people are going through far worse problems than chemo, but I couldn't seem to get any words to rhyme until I got up and came out to my notebook and pen.
And even then, with my heart walking in the shoes of any who are hurting so much worse than I...it flowed a bit more like free verse, without perfect rhythm, but maybe that was as it should be.
O God, Are You Enough?
When life is reduced to misery
and pain,
When I experience heartache again,
and again,
When I feel that all my efforts
are in vain,
O God, are You enough?
When those I love elude me
or forget,
When tears run down my face in silent
rivulet,
And when I try to thank You but
can only fret,
O God, are You enough?
When words have hurt and crushed me
to the ground,
The things that others say go round
and round,
Or when cold silence speaks more icily
than sound,
Are You enough, O God?
When no one understand where I
may be,
And I am all alone
in misery,
When hunger drives me to
a helpless knee,
O God, are You alone enough?
When loss and grief have entered
my own door,
I cannot find whom I have long searched for,
And darkness settles chilly
more and more,
Is God the Lord alone enough?
God of holy trinity, when my heart is stone,
Melt it with Your gentle love, and my spirit own.
Father, Son, and Holy Ghost--I am not alone!
Now speaks my heart in joyful song--
God's presence rights my every wrong.
God is enough, though nights seem long.
I reach across a chasm wide
To welcome my enemy to my side,
God is enough, I cannot hide
His love, His everlasting grace,
Together with Him we take our place--
My God has shown His matchless face!
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