"C Hill," Canoes, and Overcoming Fear

 During family vacation a week and a half ago, I was taken aback at how many fears hit me freshly--and how many I had to overcome. 

Someone mentioned about a young person we know who does not like cows, and in my heart I was looking down on that person--until I asked myself, "So what don't I like?" 

I had to get my nose back in place because, although I like cows, I am afraid of them! 

I am also afraid of water--at least as far as going somewhere on top of it such as in rivers or lakes or oceans. I tried to learn to swim over and over in my younger years, but I just never got the hang of it. My mom, of course, had been raised in public schools and taken swimming lessons in YWCA surroundings, (even taken training to be life guard) and had learned to swim well. She tried to teach us children the few times our parents took us to some river somewhere (usually cold and rocky). 

I found myself worried to death about some of the children deciding to canoe down the Gunnison River or the North Fork Saturday. Three young men our family knew have drowned in recent years--all excellent swimmers. 

I was glad the young people all wore life vests--especially Rose, who, despite being 4 1/2 months or more along in her second pregnancy wanted to row along. 

It was a beautiful day, and the river looked placid enough and not very deep, so I threw my fears to the winds--and my children into the hands of God, once again. All went well, except for the one rocky spot where five children had shot through the white water but Rose ended up having her canoe tip and she was in the water!

(Tim caught the whole thing on video, stopping at just the most exciting part because he was putting his phone down to go help his sister!) 

 

I am also afraid of heights--and narrow, rocky roads that climb steep, high hills with so many rocks and pebbles that look like they are about to slide under our wheels. For sunset Saturday night, Tim wanted to take us up "C Hill," as it is called there behind his home, a high hill with the letter "C" made out of white rocks, standing for "Crawford," the town he lives in. 

There were more than one terribly sharp, narrow curves in that road, and I, sitting between Jonathan and Tim who was driving, was whispering, "Dear Jesus!" more than once.

We spun out more than once, leaving me more nervous than ever until Tim got the 4-wheel-drive gear in place in his poor old dilapidated truck.  

He did his best to drive slowly and carefully coming back down the road, much to the relief of his poor old mother. I think it is much worse coming down such roads than going up them. 

Tim will not have to look back with regret that he didn't care about his mom's feelings, because he did. And I so appreciated it. Another's care helps me overcome fear. 

Then there is the fear of the dangers my children face--like the challenges Tim faces daily driving his logging truck, especially in inclement weather. Tom rose at 1:30 or 2 Monday morning to spend the morning driving with him for the first time while the rest of us blissfully slept another four hours. 

Over and over I have to hand my children and my fears about them to the Lord. It is the best place to put them. 

I also allow myself to voice my fears, to let my family know. Whether it helps or not is for you to judge. 

This is what the children said when they heard I was worried about them going out on the river in their canoes after so many swimmers we know have drowned. 

"They knew how to swim," they told me, "and we don't, so we aren't going to drown!" 

:) :):)

And they didn't!

Baby Moments, Black Canyons, and Safety in God

Sunday evening a week ago while we were on family vacation in Colorado, we drove to watch the sunset at Black Canyon of the Gunnison. I do not care for heights, but I do love awesome scenery, beautiful sunsets, being with family, and admiring God's majesty. 

Down in the bottom of the canyon, the water of the Gunnison River (aptly named) roared and echoed far away. I looked over the fence several times, but most of the time stayed comfortably back a little distance. Heights bother me a lot, and when I'm already weak and whoozy most of the time, heights are even worse. 

Little Ellie was having a blast walking on rocks on our side of the fence, just feet from the sheer cliff. Her mom and dad, grandparents, aunts and uncles were all watching out for her...

...just like our heavenly Father watches out for us when we teeter on the edge of a steep cliff down into a black canyon of despair or discouragement. 

He is right by our side, on this side of the fence, not that, keeping watch above His own. 

The Lord has sent us sweet grandchildren, with some of the smiliest faces, and so much more, to keep our hearts cheered and spirits refreshed during some of the most difficult days of our lives. 

 For four lovely days last weekend, we got to revel in the bliss of God's blessings of little grandchildren. 

Am I actually saying grandchildren? I remember when I could hardly believe I was getting married. Then I could hardly believe I was having my own baby.

Then I could hardly believe one or two of my children were getting married.

And now there are dear grandchildren!

Who needs TV and video games when babies are around? I loved these scenes of Grandpa Jonathan and little Ellie.

Especially this one! How little ones do look up to us!

May we not fail to take advantage of each moment to love them, teach them, read to them, carry them, enjoy them, correct them (Danny just read verses in Proverbs about correction last night), and pray for them. 

One morning, Ellie and Charlie were both in one of Tim's recliners, and everyone was gathering around to take photos. (Sam and Caitlyn do not want me posting pictures of Charlie's face on social media, so I am respecting their wishes!)

Here above, Ellie has found Tim's broom and is chasing a squealing Carrie all over the house--much to the delight of both!

Tim and Ellie at Ranch Haven

Hannah with Ellie

My Birds and Chipmunks Hour

 Jonathan likes big things like elk and moose; I enjoy small things like wrens and chipmunks. 

And God provided these joys for both of us during our vacation in the mountains. 

It was wonderful to leave the usual work behind, such as the work in White River on the church and parsonage electric line that had been damaged by the storm. 

The day before we left, Danny had been helping with the electric and then laying bricks for a job in town as well. I struggled through getting everything ready that we needed to take along. 

Now on Friday morning, while the rest of the family set off from our parking spot at the end of the road to the trailhead for Mt. Baldy, I stayed behind. I knew I wasn't up to the climb. Even Jonathan set off with the youngsters. 

One of the children got this picture of the two daddies carrying their babies. 

As I watched the last of the group disappear on their way to the trail and Mt. Baldy, I chose not to open the door even the teeniest bit to selfpity or even nostalgia. Instead, I started thinking about the gentle presence of God there with me, so I was not alone. 

Gratefully, it was a beautiful, warm but not too hot day. 

And nearby a mule had been tied to a long line near a horse trailer and truck. We could not imagine how a horse trailer could have been brought up the lumpy road, but there it was. 

With the mule nearby, it did not feel lonely!

I started noticing all the little flowers and heard little sounds of fluttering as tiny mountain birds were dipping down to the puddles left over in the dry creek bed, drinking and bathing. I got a cushion from the Honda, a jacket, and water and then went down and sat barefoot by the same creek.

Near me, a few brave birds came to drink and splash. 

I sat there a while, just watching. 

Just being. 

Those moments were delectable. 

(This photo was taken later on our way down the mountain when several of us got our feet in the water of the stream we drove near. It was one of our few chances to get our feet into a stream and let all those wonderful positive electrical energy pulses rejuvenate our tired bodies.)

Up on Mt. Baldy, the children were having fun. 

But so was I. 

They were enjoying the high mountain, the enormous scene, the bigness of God's creation.

I was enjoying the birds and flowers and chipmunks that came chirping nearby as I sat on a stump near the Honda later and caught up in my journal. 

"How big is God!" the lyrics go. 

"How great and wide His vast domain. 

To try to tell, these lips can only start. 

He's big enough to rule His mighty universe,

Yet small enough to live within my heart."

And so Jonathan was given elk and moose and mountains to satisfy his muscular male cravings. 

And I was given mountain flowers and wee birds and cheeping chipmunks--

and we both were blessed to know they all came from a God big enough to handle all our problems and small enough to care about each one. 

Jonathan's Elk--and Even Something Bigger!

 "I would like to see an elk," Jonathan said as we started heading into the mountains to spend the weekend with our children in Crawford where our son Tim lives. And wouldn't you know it, he got to see elk and so much more. As we were rounding a bend in the mountain road Friday on our way up to Mt. Baldy, didn't an elk show up right in the middle of the road!

So did a flat tire, within minutes of the elk. The elk disappeared in no time flat, before we could snap a photo, but soon something sounded way too flappy or floppy, whatever you want to call it, and we had to stop to check the tires on the Honda. Sure enough the passenger side front tire was flat! (My fault, I suppose, since I was sitting on that side! :) :)

Just ahead, a small herd of cattle had made their peace with this section of the road, but we disturbed them and their peace. 

While the cows disappeared, our children following us in two other vehicles began to appear to help. One son brought a compressor, another helped find a jack, and in short order, the donut tire was on and the bad tire bolted back under the vehicle. 

It all happened in a shady part of the road, which I appreciated and enjoyed. I just think of the special mercies of the Lord even in the moments of vacation when things go wrong. We especially notice the little things the Lord does when big things are  going wrong, such as Jonathan's lyme disease that is causing him so much pain that he would have had a hard time managing the flat tire business all by himself. 

So Jonathan had seen his elk, but the Lord had more for him. As we were heading back down the mountain several hours later, what should appear before our amazed eyes but moose--a pair of them!

Baby Ellie was so excited about them! We sat for a long time gazing at them, as they peered curiously back at us and began crossing the road. 

We watched them disappear into the woods and drove slowly closer, motioning to the vehicles behind us to look. 

Mr. Moose kept peering out at us!

I thought how kind of the Lord to allow some big, fascinating creatures to satisfy Jonathan's craving for huge animals!

Not only did we see those moose, but Monday as we were heading down the mountains, we came upon a whole herd of elk!

We captured some mighty fine photos of them racing across the river!

Thank You, Lord, for the delights of the big creatures You made, and for the smiles they brought to my husband's heart!

Chef Hats Steal the Show

During family vacation in Colorado at Tim's home, anybody who helped with the cooking had to wear a chef hat!

Our creative son-in-law Tom ordered a dozen of them just for the occasion, especially since he and Tim decided that the guys would do a lot of the cooking. 

I arrived from where some of us family stayed at Ranch Haven to find these scenes Friday morning last week. 

The guys were making a luscious breakfast on Tim's stove. He is in the middle of remodeling his kitchen and still saving money for new cabinets, counter, flooring, and other things. 

We appreciated his allowing his big clan to crowd into his home. 

Some of us stayed with him and some at rooms in Ranch Haven where our dear friends, Mike and Kim Sayler allowed us to stay. 

Friday evening we ate a picnic around the gazebo Tim had built, complete with three wooden swings Tim himself had built recently. He said it was the first time it had been used. Yay!

The guys grilled chicken breasts that Sam and Caitlyn had brought, along with corn on the cob. 

I kept walking around the beautiful green grass that Tim planted last year in this corner of his property. We had to all scram from the gazebo at eight o'clock because that is the time when his timed sprinkler system came on!

I was helping with the meal, so Tom plopped the white 

chef hat on my head!

Breakfast around the tables crammed into the kitchen.

And now crammed into his livingroom!

More posts coming up about other parts of the three days we spent together. 

The Snake I Stepped On

(From a letter I wrote family.)

Well, there I was, while everyone else was gone to work at their various jobs,  very innocently pulling thistles and weeds, gathering up stuff around the deck, and bringing pieces of scrap metal junk over to stow by the side of the garage by the grill since Danny is welding projects with scrap metal. Just as I set down the bent metal grate by the house, something caught my eye, and I realized all at the same time that I was stepping on something that moved! It also slithered, and did something else, and I could see that I had just stepped on a snake! Unfortunately, no one was even there to be entertained by my dancing and screaming! I could see that it was striped longitudinally with black and orange and white. When I looked down at my foot, white liquid stuff was on my skin and black sandal! 

I watched that snake slither back behind the grill by the house, and could tell right away that it was not a rattler or something else ominous, though it was quite large. I instantly thought it was a milk snake, due to the white spray on me, since our family has seen milk snakes before in Colorado. I went back to work, but when I finally came into the house, I looked up milk snake, and that is not what it was. Milk snakes have stripes going around them, not lengthwise. At this point, I think it must have been a ribbon snake, but I am not sure. Thankfully all the snake pictures that look anything like it appear to be non-venomous snakes. And I am still alive, though I am very stiff and sore from all the outdoor work.

It being five weeks since my last chemo, I had enough energy today to work outdoors. I pulled hundreds of thistles and ragweed and tumbleweed, picked garden produce, and collected the patio chairs that the storm had blown to the fenceline. 

Three of the four chairs were badly broken and ruined.  (Sorry this picture came up sideways.) You can see the broken chairs and piles of weeds by the burn barrel.)

But I also found the roof to the tool shed only maybe 50 feet away from the shed, still in mostly one piece. But the glass window from the door (and I don't know where the door is) is shattered. I also discovered several watermelons growing OUTSIDE the garden fence. 

Fawn came out while I was working outdoors, grazing. He is probably hungry since we are starting to wean him. He is too big now and jumps on us. He muddied Hannah's skirt this morning and she was quite upset. 

Yesterrday's PET scan in Rapid City had the results in just a couple hours. Thank God, still no sign of cancer, and the concerning node in my lung has "resolved." I was so relieved. I am to see the oncologist tomorrow. She said last time that the PET results were good because of the medicine, which she said means I must keep taking the herceptin/chemo. We'll see what she says tomorrow.  

Well, we have a bunch of garden produce to freeze or can like cucumbers, green beans, and beets and enough tomatoes to make frozen pizza sauce. So I better get busy. (Sorry that photo came up sideways.) But just thought family might enjoy the snake story. Elon's long, yea very long epistle was most interesting to read a couple days ago about his and Anita's 32nd anniversary. And this being Jonathan's and my 32nd anniversary as well, I am writing to let you know what is happening with us! As for Jonathan, I forgot to mention, he had to collect bleach spray, hydrogen peroxide, and rags to take to the rez house he and Danny are working at today. Yesterday they had to take a bathtub out to replace, and the tub had all sorts of yellow liquid on it, which Jonathan believes was related to the cats in the house. So on our 32nd anniversary he is working at this job and I am having snake and thistle and weed challenges, but for supper I hope to serve some nice garden produce if I am not too stiff to prepare it! And tomorrow after our medical appointments in Rapid City, we may eat out somewhere special like a Chinese restaurant to celebrate. 

Safe so far from the snake,

Anna